Table 3 Looking after themselves
StrategyCarer’s comment
Emotional support‘I think it’s just talking and, we’re all in the same boat’. (Wife FC12)
‘There were times when I was finding it very difficult… my wife really helped out, my friends… just offloading… helps, it’s all good’. (Son FC2)
‘Go and get help earlier’. (Wife FC7)
Time for themselves‘It is a strain, it is a strain because I can’t go off and do things… I’d like to… take my dogs for walk and things like that… I love walking… but I can’t do that now because he’s forever calling, or if he cannot hear me…’ (Wife FC10)
‘… I keep telling myself I’ve get to get out, some time out because I think it will be better for [wife] because… you get a bit bad-tempered’. (Husband FC3)
‘I do write a lot, I like poetry. I write my poetry. For me, that’s an avenue’ (Wife FC16)
‘…I pray a lot and ask God to help me, not to solve the problem but to cope with the problem because I can’t solve the problem, you’ve got to cope with it’. (Husband FC18)
Practical support‘…it is good, because it gets her out of the house… it’s every other Saturday… My son [takes her] one session my daughter the next session, to give me a break. Family do get involved’. (Husband FC18)
‘It gives everyone a break… that’s the best thing… take it in turns. Like when I needed the help, they were there’. (Daughter-in-law FC3)
Paid support‘… the carers that come in, when I couldn’t… because to give him a bath, and like that, I just drew the line’. (Sister FC15)
‘…he doesn’t get agitated that often. And I think it’s because we’ve got a very good routine with him and I’ve got very good carers and myself. So… he says he’s happy… the carers are very intuitive sort of people and very natural with him’. (Wife FC6)